Warning: Adult content and Sexual related
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liability.
Good news, men—the adult toy industry has
developed a whole line of products just for you! While the range
of toys for men isn't as broad as that of toys designed for women,
boy toys are certainly interesting, and can seem as strange and
pretzel-like as anything you'll find in the women's section of the
adult toy store. Toys for men come in the same gamut of colors,
styles and materials as do toys for women, and can be just as
confusing. Don't be alarmed, however ... we'll tell you everything
you need to know! And remember, men can also use most toys
designed for women; many men enjoy dildos, vibrators and anal
toys.
Where Do I Hide My Sex Toys?
It's a common question: you've amassed a veritable treasure trove of dildos,
vibrators, lubricants, massage oils and Pleasure Wipes. Now where on earth
do you put them?
You'd be surprised how many people ask us for suggestions on where to store
their sex toys so their children, cleaning woman or parents don't recognize
them! Until people started asking my husband and I what to do with their collections,
I'd never given it much thought. To be honest, when you're a childless married
couple who work in the sex toy industry, it's a no-brainer: we keep our toys
next to our bed, in a big, pretty blue box covered with butterflies, and we
keep our waterproof toys in a plastic basket on the window ledge in our bathroom.
However, let it not be said that I won't do research to find answers for
the MyPleasure faithful! I surveyed 150 people, all of who own sex toys, and
found some good suggestions for storing sex toys.
Rule Number One: Keep it in Reach of the Bed
The main thing to keep in mind when figuring out how and where to store your
sex toys is simple: keep those toys close to the bed. Over and over again,
we heard there's nothing worse than having to interrupt foreplay to walk across
the room and unpack a toy from its secret spot deep in the underwear or sock
drawer. If it's not close to the bed, it's not a good place to store your
toys. The same goes for lubricant and massage oil. Keep em handy, or plan
ahead.
In the Nightstand
By far and away, the number one place people store their sex toys is in their
nightstand. Granted, if you have nosy children or parents who go through your
drawers, this isn't going to solve your problems. But if you're just looking
to be inconspicuous, nightstands usually have drawers, and drawers are a great
place to store sex toys. The best part of this location, though, is that it
keeps the toys close to the bed. It's unoriginal, but functional. Do you need
more? Okay, read on.
Shoe Box
The number of people who confessed to storing their toys in a shoebox overwhelmed
me! Really, I'd never thought of it, but I guess it makes sense. While people
might be tempted to browse through somebody's dresser or nightstand drawers,
they'd probably be substantially less inclined to open a shoebox. As one friend
of mine put it, "I store my toys in a cardboard shoe box under the bed
-- we called it the ‘Box of Fun.' I know, a cardboard box isn't the
nicest thing in the world -- but it has the advantage of looking discreet
if anyone (cleaning lady, mom, sister, etc.) ever discovers it."
Well, I certainly wouldn't have thought of a shoebox, but apparently a lot
of people did, and with good reason. Some people even then line the inside
of the shoebox with some kind of softer material for padding. What a wonderful
idea!
In the bed
By this, I mean in between the mattress and the box spring. This one also
surprised me since I'd be concerned about breaking an expensive toy by accidentally
smashing it while playing (or sleeping!). However, if you've got less expensive
toys -- and not all that many of them -- this method also keeps them handy
and close to the bed. While we know some snoops who will take the time to
lift up a mattress and look under it, it's far less likely than having them
open your dresser drawer.
There are some other drawbacks to this storage method, though. One respondent
pointed out a fear he carries with him whenever he's dating a woman who stores
her sex toys between the mattress and the box spring, "This is only a
difficult place because several of them have had little peashooter guns which
were also stored between the mattress and the box spring. I wouldn't want
to be half asleep and have them grab the wrong thing!"
Well, yes, life can be rough. My initial concern, though, is that this man
has clearly dated many women who own peashooter guns.
The other drawback to this storage method is that it's no good if you have
a cleaning woman, a parent or a teenaged child who changes your bedclothes
for you (I know, we should all be so unfortunate). In that case, you'll definitely
want to choose another hiding place!
Custom Casing
This is by far the most elaborate and expensive solution I heard about, but
it also solves the problem of storing sex toys while keeping them discreet
and out of the reach of unwanted hands. A number of companies will design
a custom sex toy case for you, which includes foam padding and a lock. While
these endeavors are pricey and can take up to several months to complete,
if you're looking for the perfect storage solution, this is it.
Hide-Your-Vibe Pillow
We loved this sweet and secretive hiding place so much that we decided to
carry it! The Hide-Your-Vibe Pillow is the perfect marriage of style and substance,
offering an easily accessible, attractive and discreet place for you to hide
your toys, lube, cleaner and accessories. This pillow won't hold your entire
collection, but it does make for a nice, convenient place to store your most-frequently
used toys. Is mom coming over? Want to hide your secret stash from the cleaning
lady? Zip up your toys and toss the pillow on the bed. Your secret will be
safe!
For Brazen People Only
Use Tupperware. Seriously. It keeps the toys fresh, clean, tidy and neat,
and conveniently stores them all in one place. In the bathroom cabinet is
another solution that got high votes. But generally, the overwhelming response
from people who don't have a problem leaving their toys out for the world
to see was on the nightstand, in plain view, for the entire world to see.
Bravo!
So there you have it. While it's our fervent wish that everyone is comfortable
enough with their sexuality to leave their sex toys out in plain view, we
understand that not everyone is comfortable doing so. Just pick a storage
method that works for you … and don't forget to have fun with it! Decorate
your shoebox, line your nightstand drawer with silk, or apply festive stickers
to your Tupperware.
Toll Free 1-800-791-9018 or 1-888-390-KINK discreetly billed.
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